With the announcement of the resignation Alaska Governor Sarah Palin last weekend, I’ve been reminded of times in my life when I’ve considered quitting.
My first try at college was in 1992, and I found out pretty quickly that it’s almost impossible to be in an abusive relationship and do well in school. My abuser lived on campus with me and much of my freshman year was spent in terror. The next year, I decided to drop out and move home to live with my parents. I remember feeling like a failure and wondering if I would ever go back to school. Two years later, I experienced one of the worst days of my life when I found out that my college boyfriend had killed himself. A few months after his death, I decided to quit my minimum wage job and go back to college.
My transition back to college was not a smooth one. My transcript was marred with bad grades. The admissions representative said that I could take classes for one semester on a conditional basis and if my grades were good enough, I would be accepted as a degree-seeking student. After one semester with a 3.925 grade point average, I was in.
Four years later, I graduated with honors. A few weeks after my graduation, I had the most severe episode of panic disorder that I’d ever experienced in my life. It was absolutely debilitating. I felt like a shell of my former self and I was afraid that I would never be able to function again. I was waiting to hear about a few grad school applications, and was afraid that I was going to be too sick to start grad school in the fall.
An acceptance letter from a grad school in New York City arrived in the mail at the same time that an acceptance letter for a grad program from my hometown college arrived. I decided to quit living in my hometown and to move to New York City so that I could study social work in an urban setting.
During my 3rd semester in grad school in Manhattan, I experienced something that shook me to my core: September 11, 2001. (more…)